This is how you pet a cat.  

Approach nice and easy – not all up in their face!
You gotta play it cool.  Don’t play it like a fool!

Now that you have your foot in the door –
don’t be afraid, ‘cause cats don’t like fear!
Relax your eyes and blink nice and slow.
Now offer your hand – do it slow and low.
Now don’t forget to be confident.  
If you don’t feel it, just pretend!!!

This is how you pet a cat.  
Petting cats is where it’s at.

How the cat reacts will tell you so –
if cat petting is go or no-go.
If the cat gets tense or pulls back, abort!
This is not the time!  We’ll try again later!
If the cat is into it, you will know –
you might get a sniff, or a lick, or a rub.

If the cat says “yes,” stay cool, but IT’S ON.
If the cat says “yes,” stay cool, but IT’S ON!

WARNING – **may not work with all cats**!!!!